Does the 'martyr syndrome' show up in your world at all?
We all need to feel like we are decent human beings. That we we OK. That inspite of our weakness and the mistakes we've made, we are not a bad person.
One of the most unresourceful ways people do this is by comparing themselves to others.
The MARTYR SYNDROME is the pattern where people keep others around them who consistently treat them poorly and behave badly.
This gives the 'Martyr' a reference point to compare themselves to. It allows them to validate and feed their own ego because they can tell themselves that THEY would NEVER EVER behave this way, so they are better than this person.
Having others constantly behave badly towards you also allows you to view yourself as almost saint like because of what you can cope with and still go about your daily business with a smile on your face.
This pattern serves to elevate their status and bolster their sense of self worth.
It is entirely unresourceful though, because the Martyr is constantly being treated poorly by those around them.
The solution is always to let go of external success and significance reference points and replace them with internal one.
Taking 100% ownership for your value and worth as a person will allow you to let go of the Martyr syndrome.