How to be a great coach


My passion and purpose is to work with people who see personal development not as a job, a business, a profession or a career - but as a calling and a craft. They desire to create beauty, art and magic in people's lives and have devoted their lives to developing themselves to stand among the worlds best change agents.  These people facilitate deep and lasting transformation. 

Here are 3 crucial things that make all the difference if you truly desire to become a transformational coach

1. Smoke what you are selling

If your intention in training to become a life coach is to fix everybody else while hiding behind the skill set, please stop now. I mean that...stop it. 

I've got friends who studied psychology at uni and now sit behind a big desk telling people how to overcome the challenges in their lives. Meanwhile, they are overweight, unhealthy, and their relationships are totally dysfunctional. 

If what you are selling is so transformational, why aren't  you transformed?

It is impossible to facilitate lasting change in someone else's life unless you have experienced lasting change yourself.

I watch coaches who are not prepared to deal with their own stuff let their clients off the hook at precisely the same places they let themselves off the hook. 

Great coaches always smoke what they are selling.

2. No behaviour management

When most people think about change, their only go to strategy is more effort, energy and discipline. 'If I just try harder to be better, it will all work out.'

The problem is that behaviour is at the end of the assembly line. It has been and will continue to be produced by whatever we really believe. 

Behaviour management therefore can never bring about lasting change. It is merely treating the symptom. 

 Transformation always happens on the level of beliefs. 

When you facilitate deep change on the level of core beliefs, the behaviour automatically takes care of it self.

The person cannot not change. 

3. No wanting

To be a great coach, you really have to get over yourself. 

If you need to be the hero in the story, again please stop now. 

Coaching is the only truly judgment free space. This means no wanting. 

You don't facilitate lasting change by accountability, encouragement, believing in your clients or pushing them to make great choices. 

It only ever happens when you create a space for your clients to take 100% responsibility for their own results. It is their life. They are the expert. Until they want the change bad enough, all the wanting in the world from you or anyone else isn't going to change them. 

Great coaching is about tapping into internal motivation rather than forcing them to change with external motivation. 



Jaemin FrazerComment